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Sunday, February 28th, 2010

Mom died.

Roofie went gonzo crazy.

Lost job.

People should really stop at red lights.

A broken clavicle and three broken ribs hurt.

OxyContin is bad, kids. M'kay.

Drug rehab has surprisingly good salisbury steak.

Sane, sober, employed, missing LJ friends, and desperately looking for a new fandom to occupy my time..

current mood: hopeful

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Saturday, August 16th, 2008
8:55 pm - A realization......
So I think I've figured out the reason I haven't found the right man yet.  

I'm looking for a man that is as good as my father. Such a man does not exist. 

My mother spent all day in the bathroom throwing up, so he brought in a pillow and blanket for her and then sat on the tile floor and played card games with her for an hour.  I sat in the living room and realized that while we can't imagine what we'd do without my mother, we'd also be completely lost without my father. 

I know I've had a lot of crap in my life, but my parents are something the universe got right.

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Monday, August 11th, 2008
6:55 pm - Nope. Not dead.

Hello to all. I haven't died or been trapped underneath fallen debris, having to eat bugs and drink rainwater to survive. 

I've just been, and don't take offense to this, dealing with more important things. i.e, my mother, my father, my mental health.........

Plus, my computer got zapped by a lightning strike about a month ago and up until last week I couldn't be bothered to call the internet service guys to my house. And I've been staying with my parents while my mother has her massive round of chemo and they'd cancelled their internet to instead pay for the super-deluxe cable package (showtime, hbo, cinemax, starz, and all the british channels too, its pretty awesome) this makes more sense because Mom spends most of her time in bed watching movies and all Dad ever did on the computer was play Bookworm and Sudoku. 

I will never in a million years catch up on posts so I'm afraid you'll just have to forgive me if I jump into an response entry without knowing all the details and sound like your crazy aunt who said something off the wall because she was out in the garage having a cigarette and missed half the conversation. 

And let's just pretend that instead of doing what I've been doing, I've been somewhere totally awesome doing something absolutely fabulous. Let's pretend my excuse for not staying in contact is that I've been climbing Mt. Everest!!!! Hells yeah!!

Except, shit, that wouldn't work, they probably have Wi-Fi in Nepal.

current mood: drained

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Friday, June 13th, 2008
10:02 pm - Is it 2009 yet? 'Cause this is cruel and unusual.


End of post.

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Saturday, June 7th, 2008
10:29 am - Thanks.
Thanks to everyone for their support on my last post. I still feel so angry and scared that I could smash every dish in my house, but the feeling is fading every moment. I've pretty much just accepted that the plan is to do whatever the hell we HAVE to do to get Mom through this. Of course there will be complaining and extended crying jags, but at the end of the day, we're going to push on through and get it done because there is no other option. 

I also wanted to thank everyone who participated in my gasoline questionaire. Thanks in part to your info (and a whole lot of googling) my office was able to put together a proposal where employees who had to travel more than 30 miles from home each day got an extra $20 in their paychecks if they worked all 40 hours. It might go a long way in helping the money crunch commuting employees feel.

current mood: blah

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Wednesday, June 4th, 2008
7:58 pm - *growls at universe*
We found out last week that my mother has breast cancer.  We found out today that it's in her lymph nodes which means she'll have to have a mastectomy, then lymph node removal, then chemotherapy and radiation, and even still they can't give us more than a 60% survival rate. Which...40 fucking percent death rate is WAY too damn high when you're talking about my mama.

And it all just SUCKS. I seriously feel like someone hit me across the face with a brick but then said "Okay, but now you still have to go to work, and clean your house, and pay bills, and still basically be a functioning human being while not trying to think about the fact that your mother (who has been an omnipresent, unmoveable, unstoppable, sheer force of nature guiding me through all the crap in MY life) is sick and scared shitless." I'm so worried that I'm gonna drop the ball when it comes to taking care of her because I'm just so used to her being the one to take care of us. 

I don't know what to do. I wish someone could tell me what to do, but I know you probably can't.  This year totally blows so far.

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Monday, May 26th, 2008
7:39 pm - Hail? Um, excuse me?

Today at 3:15pm, dime-sized hail rained down on South Alabama.  On May 27th! Memorial day weekend! The beginning of Summer!

It's astounding to think some idiots still don't believe there is a climate crisis!!

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2:56 pm - Happy Birthday, D!!!!!
Happy Birthday to one of my favorite people........nebakanezer!!!!


And in case you are unclear on the extent of your own awesomeness, let me clarify: 


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Thursday, May 22nd, 2008
             Happy Birthday to i_am_girlfriday!!!!!!!!


May you have a happy and joyous day filled with presents and delicious foods that miraculously have no calories!

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Tuesday, May 20th, 2008
5:43 pm - Spoilers for.......well almost everything.....

RANT!!!!! ahead about BONES, BROTHERS&SISTERS, LAW&ORDER, BSG and any other damn show that's pissing me off!!!!

Next you're gonna tell me that Lucy Ricardo was a Nazi spy, that Chief Andy Taylor was running a prostitution ring out of Mayberry County Jail or that Mr. and Mrs. Walton were addicted to meth and were brewing it in their barn on Walton's mountain.

current mood: aggravated

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Wednesday, April 30th, 2008
9:47 pm - Quick questionaire........
 It's for work. Anyone who sees this could just post a quick response, I'd appreciate it.

What does gasoline cost in your area?  

If you could put if you measure in gallons or liters.......

If you could put if it's in American, Austrailian, Canadian dollars (or whichever unit of currency)............

1. Right here, right now, gasoline costs $3.61American per gallon for regular grade.

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Monday, April 28th, 2008
8:09 pm - Ah, what am I gonna do with Dr. Temperance Brennan AKA Bones?

"Elephants are not purple. This is wrong."

For some reason, I've never laughed so hard.

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Sunday, April 27th, 2008
10:13 am - Praying I don't get heavy objects thrown at me........

Hello, Flisters!! 

I know you haven't seen me around much, and I apologize. The truth is, I actually have been checking LJ from time to time, checking to see how all of you are doing, but I've done practically no responding. 

I hope that doesn't offend anyone and I hope maybe you'll see that I did it as a favor to ya'll. But these last couple of months I was kinda thrown into a deep steamin' pit of depression and when that happens I become a totally different, nasty, negative person than who I usually am.  

I really didn't want any of you to see that other person I can become. You've all been so great to me and, even with my mind as screwed up as it was, I knew I didn't want to run the risk of saying something horrible and derogatory to someone and making them feel bad/ruining our friendship just because there was something wrong with me. 

I'm hoping to move back into LJ at quarter-speed, then half, then eventually full time.  But I WILL BE BACK!!!

I'll try to be around more than I had been, but even when I wasn't here, in the immortal words of Elvis/Willie Nelson: "You were always on my mind."  


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Monday, February 25th, 2008
6:55 pm - Because I'm going to bed and don't want to forget tomorrow.


A joyous and happy birthday 


Sophie's Mom (aka: ez_as_pi) 

Have a great day, you deserve it.

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Tuesday, February 19th, 2008
9:00 pm - Because she's just so wise and....wait, no she's not.
Lindsay Lohan thinks the entertainment industry is responsible for Heath Ledger's death. 

Watch me try and give a crap what you think, you coked out little brat. It'd be more entertaining than "I Know Who Killed Me" And it's funny you're about 15 years younger than Marilyn Monroe was when she died, yet you still look like her great aunt (who has had a LOT of botched plastic surgeries)

Moving on to more pleasant topics, why has no one told me about Supernatural? And why have I just recently discovered Pushing Daisies too? Why has my flist not been kidnapping me, tying me to a chair in front of a screen and forcing me to watch these sparkling specimens of television that I did not know existed? 

Ya'll know I'm not that smart! I count on you to tell me these things!

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Friday, February 15th, 2008
5:52 pm - I grew a spine today! Yay me!
So, has anyone noticed that I've been remarkably absent as of late? Last night, when I got home from work at 11:35pm (after once again working for 14 hours straight) I figured out the reason I've been so busy lately is because I'm a total pushover. 

I like my new job, and I want to do it well, but it's been completely consuming my life. I've barely seen my family and friends up close, my house is a pigsty and I've had to drop one of my night classes.  My swiss cheese brain completely forgot that yesterday was Valentine's day, and I also forgot nytel's birthday. Nytel!!! Who was the first internet friend I had when I started ff.net and LJ!!! 

Finally I had enough. 

A manufacturing company is in process of moving one of their divisions into the area, bringing about 40-50 prospective new jobs with them and they hired my company to do all their Human Resources. That's really good news for my company. They pegged my manager to lead the project and she picked me to assist her, which is also really good news for me. 

The only problem with the situation is that she is in charge of the corporate stuff (going to strategy meetings, lunches and traveling to the company's main headquarters) while I'm doing the everyday stuff (interviewing and hiring entry-level employees, screening them with background checks and drug tests, Safety and Risk Training, processing info for payroll and benefits, handling employee questions and problems, etc. etc) Needless to say, I got the suckier end of the deal.

So I've been spending most of my time at the plant (about 35 miles away, another reason for my time suckage) It is a lot of work, and sometimes so damn frustrating I want to cry. The plant is a 24-7 operation, roofietoofis NOT.  But the work has to be done, and up until today, I was trying to do it all myself. 

My company had only authorized 15 hours of overtime a week for the project, but I've actually been doing about 25-30 hours overtime.  And even when I'm not there, I'm driving there, or I'm on call, or I'm reading up on all the things I have to do. But like an idiot, I didn't report my true overtime hours, I just put 55 hours. 

Finally today I told my manager how stressed I was and she 1. Told me to always report my true hours (if there is work to be done and I have to do it, I should get paid for it, to hell with what the big boss says) 2. Told me to hire or bring over someone else to help me. 3. Told me to take the next four days off.  It was totally not a big deal and now I wish I'd done it 2 weeks ago.

I'd been so worried that standing up for myself was going to cause problems for everyone that I've been keeping my mouth shut and now I realize that's a stupid thing to do. And plus I feel like a total hypocrite for telling nebakanezerand i_am_girlfridayto stand up for themselves and not get bogged down by jobs, and here I go,  not taking the advice myself. 

That ends now, you're looking at a new and improved me! And while I'll still be very busy for the next little while, at least I won't be tear-your-hair-out crazed anymore. 

Love to you all! *Smooches*

current mood: relieved

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Tuesday, January 29th, 2008
6:21 pm - but when I watch my radio, nothing happens!!!!

Between the writer's strike (i'm all about solidarity, guys, but give me back my damn shows, already!) and the 10,000 month wait for new BSG, I'm kinda hating TV right now. 

If they keep this up, I might have to go out and get me a life, and no one wants that.

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Sunday, January 13th, 2008
5:47 pm - Hello, all.


Dad is home. Thanks to everyone who sent well-wishes.

Will try to catch up with you this week. 

Missed you all something fierce.

Bye.  :)

current mood: content

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Monday, January 7th, 2008
6:09 pm - Hi. I'm not dead. Just absent.
Hi. *waves hand wildly* 

I'm sorry I've been so inactive on LJ (well, not just on LJ, in my real life too) but my dad has been sick lately and we've been spending most of our free time in the hospital with him. And since I don't have a laptop, Blackberry, etc. that means I've been shirking my on-line duties.  

Dad is actually going to be okay, but it's going to be a bit longer on the long road. Bacterial Pericarditis (I don't even know if I'm spelling that right) it's an infection of the sack of tissue and fluid that surrounds the heart. He's got about 3 more weeks of antibiotics and about 6 more days have to be in IV form. He's almost 60 and not in the best health anyway, so we're just grateful that it wasn't a lot worse. The 18hour trip to Kansas and back for Christmas certainly didn't help, he was admitted just a few days after we got home.

The cardiologist treating him is great, but the hospital is not well-known for taking good care of their patients, and Dad is too weak to stand up for himself, so we've had someone there round-the-clock to make sure he's taken care of, needless to say, that's leaving all of us a little tired. But what can I say, he'd do the same for any one of us. 

Then when he gets back to normal, I'll have work and school to catch up on, so it still may be a little while before I can get back into the full on-line swing of things.  But I just wanted you all to know that I'm thinkin' bout ya. 


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Friday, December 21st, 2007

Well, I'm not  completely antisocial yet, but I'm just a black hoodie and pair of mirrored sunglasses away.

I've spent very little time with ya'll as of late, and I apologize. But I'll be away for 9 days during Christmas and didn't want to go without wishing all of you a very MERRY CHRISTMAS !!

Hope it's joyous time, and I hope you have a Happy New Year too. 


current mood: cheerful

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